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Orphan Wars
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Orphan Wars Snippets
OW Draft 2 - Opening SceneJames Paine stood in the sunlight. He flexed his tanned calves and biceps and pushed shaggy blond hair from his thin face. In his hand, he gripped a striped ball. His long fingers clung to the textured material, reaching nearly halfway around. He narrowed his eyes and glared down the field at his opponent, who was hunched over with his hands forward. A breeze flowed through and a crowd cheered.OW Draft 2 - Opening Scene
James drew back the ball. His arm muscles bulged. In a blur of color, his arm snapped forward and the ball whistled through the air toward his son. A boy of seventeen, Zidaiku Paine leapt into the air and wrapped his arms around the
by *Fridgecrisis
OW Draft 2 - End of Ch1A short while later, Zidaiku approached the apartment. He gently turned the doorknob and pushed, carefully controlling the door to keep it from squeaking. He expected to find total darkness inside, but the television in the corner was on, repeating the menu sequence of The Gift, one of Angel’s favorites. He smiled, knowing he could tease her for this. Silently, he approached the couch and leaned over the back. Wrapped in Zidaiku’s blaket was not Angel, but Melina. She was asleep, her hair fanned out across his pillow and her mouth slightly open. Even in sleep, her eyelids looked heavy and swollen with fatigue.OW Draft 2 - End of Ch1
For a mom
by *Fridgecrisis
Orphan Wars - Snippet 1 Back in the apartment, just as the sun began to shine through the spaces between skyscrapers and clouds, Zidaiku’s eyes shot open and he let out the breath he had been holding. Still feeling alarmed, he rose and took in his surroundings. Instead of the hostile Narrows, he was safely back at home, wrapped in his usual blanket, and his heart slowed down to its usual pace. He took a few slow, deep breaths, and tried to reassemble his memory. The strange and mysterious events of the night before felt like a dream to him now and he almost couldn’t remember if they had actually happened. But as he awakened to fullOrphan Wars - Snippet 1
by *Fridgecrisis
This is my novel! These are just small parts of a much larger work. I would love it if you'd give it a quick read. I'm very grateful for your feedback!  Thank you! |
Newest
Tin GirlHer eyes were outer space and I could not breathe. They were deep, black, and empty, flecked with white paint: two voids so blank I wondered if she'd ever held a heart at all. She kept them wide open when we kissed.Tin Girl
I didn't usually go to night clubs, but a friend needed to get out. As I waited next to the men's restroom for him to finish up, I felt my heartbeat blend with the muffled music. That was when she and her heels strutted by. She told me her heart had gone missing and she was looking for some new blood. Then she gazed inside me and gravity let me loose. She swallowed me and I tumbled forward, frightened and dizzy, spinn
by *Fridgecrisis
Pokemon Indigo: Prologue Pt. 1“Go, Dragonite!”Pokemon Indigo: Prologue Pt. 1
Indigo threw his Poké Ball high in the air. It caught a shining beam from the floodlights before falling to the ground in the middle of the wide arena. The ball burst open in a flash of light and the form of a tall, winged dragon appeared, slowly fading from its white energy form to its solid mass. It let out a loud cry, and the crowds surrounding them cheered.
Indigo pointed a finger toward the green Vibrava crouched on the other side of the arena. “Now, Dragonite!” he cried. “Use Outrage!”
The Dragonite roared again and glided forwar
by *Fridgecrisis
Murkrowby *Fridgecrisis
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How are you? I haven't spent much time around here lately.
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Check out my novel-in-progress, Orphan Wars!
Thank you for posting... I really wanted to read it. I noticed after I sent you that that mine isn't up either. ha ha.
Orphan Wars is going great! I finished my first draft in, um... May, I think, and since then I've done a lot of rewriting (and slacking, too). Currently I'm doing Draft 3, a completely new rewrite, but a GOOD one. I just finished Chapter 2 the other day and it's about a hundred times more exciting than the original. This will likely be the last time I rewrite--after that, there will just be local revisions and editing and stuff. So it's coming along.
So what's your novel about? Is it one of the ones you told me about back in the day?
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Check out my novel-in-progress, Orphan Wars!
I'm glad you're so far along in Orphan Wars!
Evelyn and the Straight Jacket is essentially about self-fulfilling prophecy. And mostly about a girl in an asylum. I think I kinda told you about it once. It's the one that I was just using the idea in my novels class without the intentions of following through but then it blossomed into such a disturbing and beautiful thing. I have to write it. haha
'Grats on getting 5,000 though! Halfway to 10,000 :P
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"Let's eat grandpa!" vs. "Let's eat, Grandpa!"
Proper grammar saves lives.
"I just wanted to see my 'Cherry' get all red..."
"I get red with anger, does that count?"
-Vassalord, vol. 2
--
Check out my novel-in-progress, Orphan Wars!
--
"Let's eat grandpa!" vs. "Let's eat, Grandpa!"
Proper grammar saves lives.
"I just wanted to see my 'Cherry' get all red..."
"I get red with anger, does that count?"
-Vassalord, vol. 2
--
They say that there is no medicine that can cure a fool... I guess that's true.
~The Legend of Zelda
The Ocarina of Time
--
"Let's eat grandpa!" vs. "Let's eat, Grandpa!"
Proper grammar saves lives.
"I just wanted to see my 'Cherry' get all red..."
"I get red with anger, does that count?"
-Vassalord, vol. 2
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